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Real Social Dynamics Wiki - Being Sexual

Being Sexual

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Showtime wrote about a sex-quiz as an extraction-tool.

Nathan’s reply: Do you guys see the lesson in this? Getting and talking to the girl sexually in a non-threatening manner. It's obvious how the quiz would work and you can replicate the same effect in any conversation during rapport. Additionally, in my experiences this is a great tool for one-night-stands and, flatly, just closing the deal.

As a matter of fact, I almost always try to get some sexual conversation going if I'm interested. Mainly I do this in rapport. I love to talk about sex and I know girls do too. It's like it's naughty or forbidden in converstation. I say some of the stupidest sh*t and they love it. I tell them about retarded stories girls have told me about hooking up with me, things girls tell me about sex, and how I've dealt with different hookups. I don't give them a laundry list, but generally I tell them at least one funny hook up story that happened to me or a friend. The key to get them thinking sexually 'under-the-radar' (ie. a non-threatening way). How I talk to them about sex is in a matter of fact way--like it's a normal conversation that happens to be about sex--and humorously. Sex is very much part of my life and my reality.

Example: School teacher one-night-stand (this happened to be the experience that crystalized to me what I did naturally--plus it is probably the most graphicly extreme sexual conversations I've had in a bar): I was still in college in Austin, Texas many years ago and my brother had just graduated so we went out to celebrate (this is before I knew about RSD or 'the community'). That night I was in a bar randomly talking to some girls with my 2 brothers (in hind site I cold approached the 3 set). Now, I tend to dominate sets and I see the hottest girl (the reason I approached) is really starting to get into me. She a school teacher and I think I role played with her about it. About 15 minutes into the conversation I used one of my current favorite transitions (I had just read ***), "why are you talking about sex? What are you sexually frustrated?". She went from interested to MASSIVELY interested. I took that cue to continue and joke about sex and how it must suck to be her (in a not having sex frame). So, there is now a HIGH vibe going on and to close it (unconsciously) I whispered in her ear exactly what I love to do during sex. I got pretty graphic. I don't recommend doing this if you don't know how to come off creepy. I owned the vibe so I knew I could do anything--I was the 10. I actually wasn't thinking of hooking up that night either--bros before hoes mentality. I, honestly, really wanted my brothers to hook up before me (something to consider about my mindset). Anyway, at closing time she gives me her number and says she has to drop off her friend and to call her in a half hour to come over. Bam! that's how it was done. Girls will CONSISTENTLY have to take care of their friends and later come back to hook up--if you run a good set.

Now, many of you guys wouldn't be comfortable talking sexually right off the bat. Others yes or if you're good this should be common sense. For beginners, i would start by sexually 'pinging' them. Drop something sexual and see if she is receptive and takes it from there. If she gives a look of 'this conversation just got interesting' then continue. Don't start off getting too graphic. I don't even really do this unless she gets really into it or I own the set beyond belief and I'm doing it to play with her.

Normally, I don't really care if she's receptive because I know my stories are good-- after all, it's just another story, frequently about my life, that I'm telling matter of factly. There's still somewhat of a 'ping' in there (look up 'reading a vibe') because I am always looking to see her reactions to see where to go next. If she isn't laughing or 'getting into the conversation' then I will switch topics. That's also fine because I have already planted the seed or "dropped the SOI". Sometimes she's just not quite there yet. Let that seed grow and later in more rapport or comfort or whenever you feel it it will be natural and/or a comeback story.

Another tip, after telling a slightly sexually veiled story, ask her questions suspiciously or matter-of-factly like, "don't you hate it when that happens?". I also show I know the score and have emotional relevance to what girls are like by saying, "girls are so funny when they do this...yadda, yadda, yadda" or "I see it all the time, girls this...".

Once I've laid the framework down and she's bought my frame, i ask her about her experiences and what SHE'S like (so I am also qualifying and LEADING her into my frame if she were to be my next hook up).

Once I've sold it, I can do whatever I want with her. KEY points leading up to this: don't be dependent on her responses, because this is like any normal conversation to me. This is NOT creepy. I am having fun!

Btw, another transitory question I've recently adopted from my boy Tim in Australia is, "where's the craziest place you've had sex?" and create a conversation about it.

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