Expression vs Impression. Natural Attraction.

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[edit] by Alexander~

Do you ever notice that when you are just having that ‘on’ night you can just do anything and it all just goes to plan. You are generating massive attraction just by doing the things that come naturally to you. Just by being yourself.

It happens the same way that you always find love when you’re not looking for it.

But what if you wanted to find and generate that love and take control over the situation.?

Let me help you understand it and allow you to have a stronger conscious control over the situation.

To help you pick up girls.

NOW! As we all know, for those who read Alex~ blogs and RSDnation: Attraction = Higher Value plus a full range of emotions. I even made a graphic for you to put as your screen saver, desktop or even to print off and put on your wall or in your diary.


If anyone asks what it is, say its quantum physics. Which I think on some level it might be.

Now, this idea of expression not impression mirrors very closely the dichotomy between the entertainer guy (a guy who games girls) and the sexworthy man (a guy who naturally generates attraction where ever he goes and has girls gaming him).

One the one side of the coin, the entertainer chode is taking action in order to impress the girls he is surrounded by. What he does is forced, certainly unnatural and for the most part he will actually feel manipulative while he is doing it.

One the other side of the coin the entertainer chode will be acting in a way that will attempt to retain an impression (reputation) that he doesn’t want to be compromised. In other words he is totally stifled and is inundated in caring what people thinks of him.

This guy experiences the feeling of walking on eggshells.

He is acting in accordance with the impression he is trying to project. Given the fact that it is merely an impression it is ultimately incongruent with who he really is.

If he feels that the *self he is* really isn’t good enough to express to the world. This self must be pretty lack lustre.

Basically, a mere impression of your true self is an EGO, and a dirty word in these parts.

So picture this. You roll up with a routine. The goal is to impress a certain reaction upon the girls you are *trying* to hook.

The problem with ‘classic game’ is that everything is done through these filters. And ultimately it is a lower value display. Instead of doing things your way you are always trying to game the girl, fit around her reality and play the contingency that you perceive will best suit her. Furthermore you will probably be misinformed about what contingency will best suit her.

Whilst you are in the impression mindset you are heavily cognitively active.

Called being conscious.

Called being logical.

Called being inside of your head.

These two things are basically state antidotes and will continue to hold you back from your potential. While other guys are letting go and just having fun you will be thinking about the impression your angle of approach is going to make.


The notion of expression versus impression is related to most aspects of being cool, and importantly achieving the by-product of natural attractiveness.

Take for example the classic I don’t buy girls drinks mentality of the community.

Imagine you roll up and propose to the fine young lady that you are going to buy her a drink thinking that is a cool thing to do and it will make the impression that you are a rich, thoughtful and socially savvy.

The moment the girl experiences this, her subconscious mind will ask the question ‘if this guy has to put up an elaborate front, is the real guy behind the front *not good enough* for me to see? Is he embarrassed or ashamed to show his real self?!’

If you have to do something impressive to perceive yourself to offer value to a women **to achieve high value** is to make it clear to her that you didn’t have more value than her to begin with.

if you are buying the drinks because thats just what you do, and a means through which you express yourself: thats cool. Your not doing in order im make an impression, your coming from the mindset of generous guy whos taking the initiative of starting the party. To you, buying a round of drinks isnt a big deal.

trust me when i say that girls can tell the difference between guys who buys drinks to impress them, and guy who buys drinks because thats just what they like to do.

So that kills off the ‘HV’ component of the natural attraction formula. What about the range of emotions?

Now for those impression seekers out there it is possible to expose a woman to a full range of emotions. These are often done in field tested routines that are designed to entertain and offend.

Button pushing bullshit.

You will get some great visual reaction to these things, but in your experience do you close these girls or do they just want to be friends? You might game them and game them and game them only to be met by an armada of ‘last minute resistance’ to use an old school community term.

For example the dancing monkey. Put the girl through a bevy of positive emotions, clowning about, making her to laugh at you, wearing clown like attire. Putting on quite a show.

What happens when the show is over? The girls look for a guy they can game. Someone unpredictable and hard to get.

Oftentimes the girls don’t even consider that the dancing monkey guy was interested in them.

Sometimes the girls realise that the dancing monkey guy is into them, and they know they can have him any time while he’s there trying to impress them.

Not exactly a game or challenge for the girls.

High value things are perceived to be hard to get.

Remember, if you’re the one doing all the impressing, then the girls don’t have a chance to impress you. If they don’t have an opportunity to impress you then you will not have an opportunity to see them for who they are. If you don’t see them for who they are then they will rationalize that you only like them for their looks and sex.

The more they have the chance to impress you is like them making an investment in you. The more they make an investment, they more they want a return from this investment. Namely, you, your time and your attention.

As for the negative spectrum of the range of emotions. I forget what the traditional community name for it is. But I think the idea is that you say something negative about the girl in order to ‘knock her down a peg’ or get her to pay attention to you.

This probably will work the same way as if you insult someone. But as soon as they get back up from their ‘lowered peg’ they will lose interest in you as you return to a place of relatively lower value than the girl. Or, if you do just straight out insult the girl she won’t even talk to you to begin with. An ever quicker way to lose the interaction.

While trying to impress a range of emotions in a girl will elicit a visible and marketable range of emotions and most times validate some kind of impresser’s ego your still just a clown in the club.

From time to time you will see guys like this. Give them credit for getting out of the house. Soon enough, out of necessity of not getting laid they will learn the error of their ways and switch it up.

It would be wrong to say that impression doesn’t work. Impression will not result in you getting laid.

Actually, my mistake.

Impression makers simply will not have success unless the girl makes an overruling decision that she wants to get laid. But this guy will still be a low value guy and rarely get laid.

And will have trouble maintaining healthy relationships.

Unless he really is a great manipulator.

Neither impressed good emotions nor impressed bad emotions satisfy the criterion of ‘HV’ or a ‘range of emotions’.

Expression is the way.

Be the music~.

The notion of expression is to exhibit yourself in an uninhibited, unstifled way. The overt communication of how you feel.

Expression is a true and authentic communication that is a by product of being unstifled.

Expression IS acting through your own intentions. Rather than trying to impress others.

‘you don’t give a fuck what anybody thinks of you’

‘you do what you want when you want’

‘you are unapologetic’

He who expresses his true self has integrity. What you see is what you get. It is authentic and as a result satisfies the ‘HV’ component of the natural attraction formula.

You see, if you don’t care what anyone else thinks of you, if you are unapologetic about your actions and you are truly internally centred and everyone around you becomes lower value to you in your reality.

Doesn’t mean they are low value people. It’s just relative.

You are the common denominator in every set. And instead of getting caught up trying to play the specific girl you do your own thing.

An expresser offers value naturally and intrinsically.

‘Attraction is a function of your ability to put your personality on the line’

‘Confidence happens when you perceive that nothing holds you back’

An expresser is not held back by the opinion others harbour of him. ‘he does not give a fuck what anybody thinks of him’

But he does take every pride in the way he expresses himself. He Makes an effort to decorate himself. He speaks well and takes the time to groom properly. He doesn’t do these things for others. He does it because of self worth and pride.

He doesn’t give a fuck how people receive him. Because he knows he has committed time and effort to expressing himself properly.

An example of a non expressive opener would be asking for someone’s opinion. Ultimately when asking for an opinion you are reacting to whatever statement (the opinion) is made.

Conversely, opening with expression would be to begin to talk about something you are passionate about or something that entertains yourself first and foremost.

Putting your personality on the line.

‘I like salad.’

‘Me and my friends just got back from Vegas where we got married, we never expected to. but hey… now I can list myself as divorced on face book! Awesome.”

‘Yo so me and my friend have a plan, we trying to act gay to get the gay guys over there to buys us drinks. Were actually geniuses, but we have never been tested so right now it’s just suspicion and propaganda. But were working hard to satisfy the curiosity of the nation.’

‘so hey, do you guys know the directions to the house of parliament? We just got the afternoon off work and we thought we might play a bit of ‘capture the flag’ with the government. You see the bar isn’t open for another 4 hours and we thought today we should earn our drinks with some political insubordination.’

Expression is about self entertainment.

Tim said: ‘game is a celebration of yourself.’ The longer you ponder this quote you realise the validity of it.

The more you can celebrate yourself in an unstifled way the more you can freely express yourself.

You become the centre of your own word and move to a place of tight inner game.

If you turn your attention to self expression you generate value out of thin air. Magnetic value. The sort of value that compels people to become involved with you.

Being expressive is the conveyance of your internal centred-ness. Certainly a high value trait.

But does expression allow for a full range of emotions?

Yes but not as directly as impressers. It is a by product.

When expressing yourself you are making statements and establishing a strong reality. To everyone involved with this they are living in reaction to you. Orbiting you.

In any interaction there is someone reacting more to the other person. This person who is reactive is experiencing emotions as reality is being dictated to them. Each new reaction is an emotional spike in and of itself.

If you were to change topic, emotion spike. If you make a self entertaining joke: emotion spike. As the girl realises that you value her to a lesser degree than you value yourself: emotion spike. If you tease the girl for being less cool than you, because you genuinely think so: emotion spike. If you demand to see how tall she really is by ‘positively dominantly’ requesting that she remove one high heel: emotional spike.

A range of emotions through expression works much the same way as the emotions you might experience as you play a computer game or read a book. In the instance of a book the author expresses themself through story and the reader gets caught up in the emotions of the story and lives in reaction to the book.

In the instance of a computer game, like Tetris for example, as the blocks speed up, you live in reaction to them and a sense of anxiety, fun, and sense of urgency come over you. Emotional spikes.

To re-state, these emotional spiking is a by product, not deliberate as though you were trying for rapport.

Expression is about going through the world for you, being the common denominator and living freely unstifled by the world around you. Expression is about communicating high value through self entertainment and unpredictability.

However, expression can become impression. If you use an ‘opener’ for the first couple of times you wont really have a good idea of what you are gointg to expect in terms of reaction. When you have no expectation then it can only be coming from a place of expression. You doing it for you.

After repeated use you get a sense of what to expect and you begin to use the line in order to illicit a specific reaction. you move away from expression and the ‘opener’ is delivered for the purpose of impression.

Girls pick up on this and instead of you communicating high value, you are perceived as being low value. Unsatisfactory in terms of the natural attraction formula.

Expression is about making it happen and the world living in reaction to you. Each reaction they experience is an emotional spike.

Expressers have high value and they expose others around them to a full range of emotions.

They are naturally attractive by being congruent with themself, they are not held back.

So, next time you’re not having that ‘on night’ ask yourself: ‘am I doing things in order to impress others, and to try and prevent making bad impressions on others?’ If the answer is yes then your in impression mode.

Switch it up, make the move, start acting through your own intentions. What would entertain you, what do you want to do, how can you mix things up? Do your thing, lead your own life and people will begin to react to you.

Don’t forget to escalate. Escalation is an expression of sexual desire. Don’t suppress it.

Jeffy says: “game is your expression of inner state, conveyed by the rhythms you use to direct the social energy of the interaction.”

Expression, not impression.

Be the music~


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